You don't have to control your thoughts; you just have to stop letting them control you.

     Have you ever been through that part of life when you think that everything is against you and you don't know what to do? Well that has been me these last couple of weeks.  It seemed like all of a sudden things were thrust upon me and I had no idea how to handle it.  I was extremely depressed, people probably didn't see it but I wasn't myself.  A lot of it had to do with the fact that I was starting to feel inadequate of what I need to be doing.  I am having a hard time saving money for next semesters tution, I have money saved for my mission but not near what I need.  I know that Heavenly Father doesn't want me to feel this way but it's hard not to.

A couple of sundays ago it was especailly bad so after church I went up to my room and offered a very heart felt prayer, and after a while I started to feel peace again.  But the pain has made its way back and I'm just not sure what to do. I'm really excited for the opportunity I have in a week to return home to my family and see their faces again, I'm really starting to miss them a lot.  2 years is going to be a LONG time, but with the help of the Lord I know that I can be at peace.  

Well know that I have you worring about me, I should probably give you some more uplifting news.  Today I went with my brother and a couple of my other cousins here at BYU to go to the batism of our twin cousins Matthew and Jared. It was so much fun to be able to see them so excited about being baptized. I wish I could see my face when I was batized, I'm sure it was adorable.  Anyway, I'm so grateful for the siblings of my father that live out here in Utah that love and care about me. It helps days and weeks like these go a little bit smoother.  

Anyways, don't worry about me I'll make it through.  Peace